Marrying Someone Older
We always hear what people have to say when the subject is about being with someone who is older. There are many rules that people lay out when they speak of this: “Do not marry someone who is 10 years older” or “If there’s a 15 year difference, then your marriage is going to fail”. The truth is that there is no rigid rule when it comes to age. Karaz’s Ahmad lists the things that you need to understand about courting someone who is older.
Physical Age vs. Mental Age
A person’s age does not always reflect the way he or she acts or feels. Ever heard someone say that a friend of yours acts young for his or her age? Or that you act more mature than other people of your age? It is always important to understand the mental age of the person that you’re going to be with. Talk to him. Discuss the things that he likes, the activities he enjoys or the music that he listens to in order to see if you are compatible in the way of thinking. Do not lay these questions at once as if you’re interrogating him. Take your time, as you probably won’t be able to understand someone’s lifestyle in just a few days.
Analyze Your Social Circles
The period that you spend getting to know each other is a great time for you to reflect on your social life, and remember that this person will be part of it now. Ask yourself if this person fit into your social life? How would your family and friends you socialize with deal with him? Find out if he is comfortable around your social circles; see if you feel the same around his crowd. Does it feel awkward? Or does the conversation flow easily? Having a stable overlapping social life is a sign of a harmonious relationship.
Understand each other’s life goals
With growing older comes the fact that you start thinking differently and having different goals in life. Talk about your plans in the future or what you aim to accomplish soon. Do not shy away from explaining what your dreams and hopes for the future are. It’s always good to know that you are on equal levels and that you both understand each other. This does not mean that you both need to have the same goals in life – as long as your views are not contradictory, compromises can be made and you can minimize future conflicts.
What do you think about the concept of marrying an older person?